Trust

This week I came home on one of my lunchtime speed-poo trips to feed Haimmie and walk the girls, and found Arwen licking at sores on her hind legs. This just about sent me into a neurotic panic and I was about to call their Dr (and my boss) for emergency advice. Matt was home thankfully and calmed me down. Instead of a panicked phone call, I took a couple of pics and went back to work. As soon as I saw Dr. C, I couldn't help but blurt out in a panicked voice about my baby's ouchies. Had she been bitten by mosquitoes? Or maybe by those evil minions of hell - fire ants? These were the conclusions I had formed in my mind on the drive back to work. It had to be something external that I could prevent.

Now reason dictates that I shouldn't feel the need to burst into tears when Arwen has a hair out of place, but my neurosis just won't allow for that sort of flexibility. I didn't actually burst into tears, but as I was telling Dr. C about Arwen, I realized my voice had risen an octave or two higher than usual and I could feel the urge rising. The mere sight of my dog's blood on her snow-white fur made me scream inside. She sent me home with antibiotics, saying that the heat and humidity had lead to a skin infection that would clear up with treatment.

Ok. Calm down. You have your answer. But what about the red ants and the mosquitoes? Could she be wrong in her diagnosis? Oh no. You're doing it! The exact second-guessing that drives us nuts at work.

"But why would allergies make Max's ears itchy? That doesn't make sense..."

Or even better, "That's not what I read on the Internet..."

We've all heard it before. And here I was, my own stubbornness getting in the way. She only graduated from vet school with a medical degree, for Christ's sake! Why should I have the audacity to doubt her? But then I stopped thinking for a second and trusted my gut to trust her. I understand now the importance of faith in the client / doctor relationship. How they must feel sitting on the other side of the exam table with their own baby who's ill. That's alot of responsibility for the doctor. I know I couldn't shoulder it. But people know a good thing when they see it, or they don't and then things go south. Fast.

As for me, this trusting the doctor thing is new. I've been the same with human doctors, although I've yet to meet one I trust completely.

I took the antibiotics home and Arwen threw up sometime around 3 am on the first night. I vaguely remember thinking to myself as I stumbled over to the vomit pile that antibiotics weren't working for her and I'd have to talk to Dr C in the morning. But I was wrong. Again. Arwen's sores are clearing up. She isn't bothering at them at all. I brushed her out today and found no new sores anywhere. It's good to be wrong sometimes. And trust is even better.